Tina Fey Dishes On Paris, Paula & Almost Getting Stabbed By Will Ferrell

Tina Fey, star and creator of NBC’s
“30 Rock,” has some strong (and always funny) words for Paris Hilton and
“American Idol” judge Paula Abdul.

Tina sat down with Playboy Magazine, who dubbed her “Goddess of Geeks,” for
their upcoming January issue. The comedian, who often used the men’s magazine as
a source of comedy while hosting “SNL’s Weekend Update,” was very candid with
them regarding some of Hollywood’s most notorious characters.

Playboy asked Tina about her appearance on Howard Stern’s radio show last
year, when she unleashed on Paris Hilton. She had said of the hotel heiress on
Stern, “She’s a piece of sh-t. The people at ‘SNL’ were like, ‘Maybe she’ll be
fun, maybe she won’t take herself so seriously.‘ She takes herself so seriously!
She’s unbelievably dumb and so proud of how dumb she is. She looks like a tranny
up close,” according to a report at the time in Us Weekly.

Tina went on to tell Stern of Paris’ hair, ” [it] looked like nasty wads of
Barbie hair on the stairs… Her hair is like a Fraggle.”

Tina appears to have some remorse about being so harsh on Paris, telling the
magazine, “I regret sinking down to that level of discourse. But Paris is a
terrible role model and a terrible young woman. She needs to be ignored. I work
with people who have 12-, 13-, 14-year-old girls who are fascinated by her. They
look up to her, and that’s not great. You can buy videotapes in which you can
see her (slang word for female genitalia).”

Paris isn’t the only one Tina takes issue with in the January issue. She’s
speaking out about the horrible time she had working with Paula Abdul on
“SNL.”

“Well, in late 2005 Paula Abdul did a guest bit on the show, and she was
awful. I was pregnant at the time and probably a little moody, but I remember
thinking, ‘She’s a disaster! I gotta prop this lady up and get her on TV.‘”

The “30 Rock” star discussed Hollywood’s obsession with body image, but gives
props to Jessica Alba.

“When I was growing up, to have a good body you actually had to have a good
body. You know what I mean? You had your shape, and whatever your God-given
shape was, that was your shape. But now—and this is what these young Hollywood
ladies seem to do—even if you don’t have a great body, you can lose a lot of
weight and get superskinny, get a fake tan and fake t-ts, and you’re in the
game. Just get super-duper skinny. Some women are the real deal, like Jessica
Alba. She has an amazing, gorgeous body. But for some of these other chicks, the
closest they can get to a body like that is to remove everything that’s there
and add a little something on top. It’s like the ladies you see in Playboy,”
Tina told the men’s magazine.

Tina, never holding back when it comes to a good joke, spoke about working
with funny-man Will Ferrell. In what appears to be an exaggeration, Tina
recounts a late night writing session with her former “SNL” co-star.

“Will Ferrell tried to stab me once. We had been up all night writing skits
for the guy from ‘Dawson’s Creek’—James Van Der Beek. And you know, it was
‘SNL’, so we were all hopped up on goofballs, out of our minds on quaa-ludes and
horse antibiotics. I foolishly made a disparaging joke about Will’s skit. I was
like, ‘Really, dude? A hat salesman who’s afraid of hats? That’s the best you
can come up with?‘ And he lunged at me with a letter opener. I remember
thinking, ‘This guy’s a genius. It would be an honor to be killed by him,‘”
concluded Tina.