FROM THE NEWS DESK: Larry Birkhead… Superstar!

TRIAL WATCH: Larry Birkhead’s stock skyrocketed today, at least in the eyes of most people watching the Anna Nicole Smith drama unfold in a Ft. Lauderdale courtroom. He was relatively relaxed with an easy smile during testimony. Even Judge Larry Seidlin noted his charm and felt comfortable enough asking Anna Nicole’s ex-boyfriend about his family. But most impressive was his seeming honesty, his straight-forward approach to answering awkward questions about his relationship with Anna, and his problems with the other man in her life, Howard Stern.

Best moment was when the Judge tried to narrow down the potential fathers to Birkhead, Stern and the businessman the judge called “South Carolina.” Birkhead told him “South Carolina” had had a vasectomy and could, therefore, be removed from the list. The judge seemed to gasp but the whole courtroom erupted in laughter. More from him tomorrow.

Anna Nicole Smith’s mother, Virgie Arthur, emerged as a more complete figure in Judge Seidlin’s courtroom this morning. She made a compelling argument that it was drugs that drove she and her daughter apart. And she convinced everyone that she really loved her grandson, and that she really loathed Howard Stern. But the positive spin stalled when it took a solid five minutes for Virgie to answer the seemingly simple question, ‘Did she ever profit from her daughter’s death?’ Later, Virgie provided the most dramatic moment of the day when a helicopter shot showed her stumbling out of the Medical Examiner’s office to a waiting car, after viewing her daughter’s body. And words from the Judge about the state of the body make it all the more compelling that a decision be made and that Anna Nicole be buried.

ANNA’S ROOMIE: More on this later, but we spoke today with a woman who first met Anna Nicole when she was still Vickie Lynn Hogan. This woman made it abundantly clear that ‘the Virgie that Anna Nicole disparaged in interviews’ was to some extent a figment of Anna’s imagination. She says Virgie loved Anna’s son, Daniel. In fact he lived with her for several years and was very close to his grandmother. If anything, this friend tells us Anna Nicole was jealous of the relationship between son and grandmother. But she also painted a picture of a woman who loved her son and who did all that she could to make a good life for him.

BRITNEY WATCH: A mid-level shockwave hit the office this morning with the news that Britney had checked out of Promises after less than 24 hours at the rehab facility with the Malibu view (funny how rehab facilities just happen to be at some of the best addresses). We had been relieved that she was Finally Getting Help. The hunt began afresh with the papparazzi chasing her to an attorney’s office where she exited leaving behind a fresh trail of rumors; ‘Was Kevin trying to drug test her hair,’ being the best one.

For one opinion on what’s going on with her we consulted Dr. Bethany Marshall, who is a psychoanalyst in Pasadena & Beverly Hills. She says if Britney is truly having substance abuse issues; she may be ambivalent about rehab, she keeps finding reasons not to like rehab.

Or she may just need to hit rock bottom.

Dr. Marshall also says this behavior we’re seeing (hard partying, head shaving) may be signs that her coping mechanisms are failing. About the babies that she keeps leaving at home. Dr. Marshall says bonding with them may remind Britney too much of K-Fed. And the babies may jumpstart feelings of guilt; that she’s failing the children that she always said she wanted. Dr. Marshall says she sees signs of what’s really troubling Britney right there on her face. She says her public smirk is a sign of hostility, that Britney is mad at the world. And here’s her bottom line: “Britney does what Britney wants to do.”

IT’S IN THE MAIL: Guess that’s what happened to our invitation to Senator Barack Obama’s Hollywood Premier last night. Needless to say it was A-List all the way, since it was arranged by DreamWorks power players Spielberg/Katzenberg/Geffen. Eddie Murphy was there… Jennifer Aniston, Morgan
Freeman, & Ben Stiller were there… George Clooney wrote a big check (they all did).

But don’t look for stars schmoozing with Obama on Access Hollywood tonight. No cameras allowed. No reporters.

How can that be, you ask? Since stars and politicians love cameras equally much. Well, the campaign and the organizers didn’t want any coverage. None.

They would not reveal who was expected, would not make working space available at the Beverly Hilton. So, what’s the deal?

Photo: Celebrity Vibe

We wanted the Washington view so we asked Ken Decell, Senior Editor of Washingtonian Magazine. He said first you have to understand that it was a fundraiser, not a media event. “Sometimes they’re one and the same, but in politics, usually not,” Ken says. “The idea was to bring in big bucks and give donors some private schmooze-time with the candidate so they’ll be amenable when they get hit up again –which they will be.”

And there’s one more reason. “Believe it or not, some of the donors — especially those who’ve also given to Hillary — probably don’t want to trumpet the fact that they were there. There will be many opportunities to be seen in public with Obama.”

And there’s another way in which Hollywood and Washington are Just Alike; nobody really wants to make a choice unless they’re sure it’s going to be perceived as the right one.