It’s been a difficult road to recovery for Sarah Hyland.
The “Modern Family” star appeared on Friday’s episode of “The Ellen DeGeneres Show” where she opened up about the suicidal thoughts she encountered following a series of surgeries.
“I’ve had about six surgeries, I want to say, over the past couple of years, but maybe sixteen surgeries all together throughout my life,” Sarah said.
She went on to explain her thought process during that difficult time and how she relied on herself to pull through.
“After 26, 27 years of just always being sick and being in chronic pain every single day and you don’t know when you’re going to have the next good day, it’s really, really hard,” she said.
Sarah confirmed that she was “very, very, very close” to taking her own life.
“I would write letters in my head to loved ones of why I did it and my reasoning behind it, how it was nobody’s fault,” she continued.
The 28-year-old actress revealed that she was afraid to write these notes down on paper because she “didn’t want anyone to find it.”
“It ended up being myself that got me out of that,” she said. “I had to do it on my own. I told myself I had to do it on my own.”
“Just saying it out loud helped immensely,” she explained.
When she was asked what kind of advice she would give to others regarding depression or suicidal thoughts, Sarah admits that her process might not work for everyone.
“Every individual is different…I’m just sharing my story. But I think talking to someone and saying it out loud really, really makes it sound almost ridiculous and puts it into perspective.”
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